The Old School Friday creators are trying to make me feel guilty, to shame and embarrass me. See, the theme for this week is music that you exercise to. You see the problem, right? The theme assumes that one does exercise—and on such a regular basis that one has a soundtrack full of tunes expressly for that purpose.
I could just jump right into the theme: “Ooooo, good theme these are my ABsolute FAvorite jams to exercise to this is a song I like to RUN on the TREADmill to and THIS is my jam for WEIGHT and STRENGTH training….”
But I refuse to lie.
Throughout my life I have tried to be a regular exerciser. I have tried to play team sports and have gone to funk aerobics lessons. I have signed up for private squash lessons and bought expensive gym memberships. I have tried having an “exercise buddy” and I have tried to exercise with my exercise-loving spouse as part of our Us-Time. I have created elaborate playlists on my iPod, complete with appropriate beat-per-minute calculations for warm-up, work-out-and cool-down cycles. I have signed up for walks to raise money for charity. I have purchased nice work-out clothes and high-tech sports bras and proper footwear and work-out bags.
Nothing I have done so far has worked for long. All of my efforts at physical fitness have been exercises in futility.
I simply do not enjoy exercising. Never have. I have never experienced “runner’s high”—that is, unless the folks trying to convince me of it’s realness have a different definition of “high” than I do. I do not find the interactions with other exercisers pleasant, thus cannot do it for the social scene. I find most exercising absolutely boring. I am not very competitive when it comes to playing sports.
And I absolutely hate to sweat.
OK. I have testified.
Now let me also say that, at 45 years old, I recognize that a regular exercise program is essential if I am to have the relatively healthy middle and older age that I desire. I realize that the great metabolism that was my lover for most of my life has left me for someone more deserving. I do not desire to feel as if I have run a marathon just by walking up two flights of steps. I need to begin—and maintain—a serious fitness program.
So, I am going to try the exercise thing again. I will. And when I do, I already have an idea of what songs will be playing in my headphones. For exercise I am partial to dance music: disco, house, techno, go-go—it does not matter. Anything with a relentless beat and, preferably, lyrics shouting at me to “MOVE IT PUSH IT DO IT WORK IT FASTER STRONGER ONE MORE TIME!”
I’ll include these songs on my Ultimate, Absolute Going to Work This Time Exercise Routine Playlist. I can’t wait to see what other OSFers have on their playlists that I might include as well. Happy Old School Friday and have an active and healthy weekend!
“Finally” by CeCe Peniston
“One More Time” by Daft Punk
“Whip It” by Devo
“Cosmic Girl” by Jamiroquai
“Soul Makossa” by Manu Dibango
Please check out the rules for joining and list of other OSF participants here.