This So-Called Post-Post-Racial Life

June 5, 2009

OSF: This is what I do to get me in the mood…

Filed under: Old School Friday, Uncategorized — Tags: , , — pprscribe @ 11:31 am

…for restarting forward progress.

You know, looking for a job can be a soul-crunching process. It can make you question your self-worth…your future…all the academic, personal and professional decisions you have made up to this point. It can make you want to burn the meaningless paper your degrees are printed on. It can make you suspect every positive word anyone has ever said about you. You begin to think…so many job postings, so many employees needed—how can no one want to hire me??? This job you are over qualified for. This one you would love, but you are under qualified for.

Well, this is exactly the mood I have been in lately. Moping around. Sure no one would hire me. Depressed and down.

To get myself out of that sorry state, I have been listening to a lot of music. A little music therapy, if you will. To try to regain a sense of optimism and forward progress, I have to musically convince myself that this, too, shall pass. I have to also do a little bragging: Eff alla y’all if you won’t even look at my resume/CV—You’ll be sorry one day. I have to think of myself as misunderstood, miscast—but just waiting to be appreciated by the right place of employment. I have to convince myself that this job or that job must have not been for me anyway…that my not getting them means that my real true passion is right around the corner.

play-ville-de-lumiere-by-goldAll of this is hard work—a full time job in and of itself. But I have gotten inspiration from these songs on this week’s Old School Friday playlist:

  • “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger” is not officially “old school” (especially not this Neptunes produced version) but I had to include it because of how positive it makes me feel. What doesn’t kill me will make be harder, better, faster, stronger. Indeed!
  • Singing Barbra Streisand’s version of “Putting It Together” makes me feel like a brilliant, misunderstood ar-teest. I survived the writing of my dissertation in large part by playing this song over and over.
  • Bill Withers is singing “Lovely Day” directly to me—as is Stevie singing “Don’t You Worry ‘Bout a Thing.” Hey, if these two tell me it’s all gonna be alright, who am I to still wear the long face?
  • EWF says step up and “Keep Your Head to the Sky” and Fleetwood Mac reminds me that The “World [keeps on] Turning” and, though through past experience I know they are right, it still helps to hear.
  • Finally, Heavy D an’ ’em singing “We Got Our Own Thang” make me feel boastful and big, full of swagger and such—better than all the rest.

I still do not have a job. But I am hopeful about this latest application I have submitted. The job was practically made for me and I was practically made for it. I can see myself sitting at the desk and passing out my new business cards. And if—somehow, impossibly, amazingly—I do not get the job, then it was not really for me.

Ima be alright.

Especially today, on OSF. Have a good one, everybody, and a great weekend!

**********

As always, a big thank you to OSF hostesses, Marvalus atΒ  Conversations with Marva

and MrsGrapevine.

Please check out the rules for joining and list of other OSF participants here.

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11 Comments »

  1. I know how you feel – though I’m self employed I recently lost two of my biggest accounts, and they went down owing me money! So I’m pounding the pavement in my own way – out there bidding on graphic design and illustration jobs like I did when I first started out 30 years ago – Rats!

    I’ve been going through a little bittersweet nostalgia at the same time and this week I’m Indulging in Nostalgia as Memories Light the Corners of my Mind.

    Boy, do I know how to play the self-pity game this week and hope you all will indulge me a bit!

    Good luck with your job search and don’t doubt your talents or abilities – they are still there waiting for the right company to appreciate them!

    Comment by popartdivatv — June 5, 2009 @ 3:34 pm

  2. Hate the “You’re overqualified” statement, especially since a headhunter told me that’s code for we really don’t want to hire you. But I do think some people are telling the truth when they say “You’re overqualified,” because they are scared that you’re going to leave when you see a better job. My thing is, “If I didn’t want this job I wouldn’t have applied for it.” πŸ™‚

    Good luck on the job search. I’m doing everything I can not to have to work a 9 to 5 right now.

    Comment by nordette aka verite — June 5, 2009 @ 4:16 pm

  3. Hoping you find the job you want. “Keep your head to the sky.”

    Comment by Hagar's Daughter — June 5, 2009 @ 5:28 pm

  4. OK the Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger made me want to get up and find a party. πŸ™‚ But I’ll take Heavy D too. He could get the deadest party jumping.

    Comment by shaeshae — June 6, 2009 @ 11:06 am

  5. EWF’s Keep Your Head To The Sky does it for me. It will be alright. Something will come through, probably while you are busy doing and concentrating on something else. BTW, have you thought about working on getting that dissertation published? Enjoy your weekend!

    Blessings

    Comment by revvy rev — June 6, 2009 @ 3:02 pm

  6. Hello PPRsribe,

    After “listening” to you over the last year or so, I get the impression that you are not the type of person that needs a job to define who you are. Some individuals lose their titles or positions of control and ultimately lose themselves. If it wasn’t for the time spent hunting for a job I truely believe you are comfortable with yourself. I think you love doing what you do while you are not working. I am generally not the one to tell someone what they should do. But in this case, I would encourage you to rest your worrys in the hands of being grateful for the days and hour in which you can use your mind to do what you want to do, when you want to do it. A grateful person will be content in the moment.

    But of course money and bills will always be an issue but it’s gonna be alright in the morning …this I KNOW! You may have to cut back on those 40 dollar manicures but am just saying :-).

    Comment by careycarey — June 7, 2009 @ 3:48 am

  7. Btw,what …no Prince this week? You couldn’t find one Prince song to get you in the mood? Dang, I just knew you’d hit us with the Whispers, you know…this is what I do to get you “In The Mood”. Wait, maybe that’s the wrong kind of mood. Well, that works to …I think. Well, that’s what they say.

    Stevie and Bill Withers was cool. You gotta feel good while listening to those songs.

    Comment by careycarey — June 7, 2009 @ 3:59 am

  8. Wow–thanks to everybody for your comments. Talk about a mood lifter!

    Ms. Diva, I was very touched by your OSF post. Thanks for your encouraging words. I have considered going the entrepreneurial/consultant route: I have great respect for those who can. But I do not think it is for me. I crave a certain stability and I am conflict-averse–Thus, I’d prolly *never* get paid! LOL

    Nordette, same @ you re: the self-employment thing: much respect. When I talk about all my friends who are writers, artists, and other creative types, yours is one of the names I mention. Never mind that we have never met in person! LOL I have a post I have been thinking about w/r/t the whole “overqualified” thing. I’ll keep you posted.

    Thanks to you both, HD and ShaeShae! Believe me, I am trying my best to keep my head pointed up, not down!

    Rev, I think you are right. I have been getting in touch with myself and with the universe through my gardening–something new to me and that I would not have been able to do had I been employed in a traditional job these past couple of months. I’ve got a post rumbling in my head about that, too. Oh, and you should be a dissertation coach! LOL

    Carey, thanks as always for your wise words. I have tried to remind myself how much I should be grateful for: my new gardening hobby, being able to be home to see my kids off to school and be here when they get home, trying new recipes in my numerous cook books, reading, blogging… I really am fortunate. (It helps that my partner is gainfully employed!) Re: Prince–I thought I’d better go 1 week without a Prince song! Don’t worry: His Badness will be back in my OSF!

    Comment by pprscribe — June 7, 2009 @ 9:42 am

  9. Ah, sis…sorry to hear that you were down. You have always been so inspiring and uplifting to me. Big bear hugs to you.

    xxoxoxo

    Comment by deesha — June 7, 2009 @ 9:45 am

    • πŸ™‚ @ D!

      Comment by pprscribe — June 7, 2009 @ 4:17 pm

  10. Nice! Especially loving the EWF & Bill Whithers!

    Comment by regina — June 8, 2009 @ 11:05 am


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